Loving God Unconditionally
For such a very long time I have been waiting for healing from anxiety and fear. Not only does it impact on my mental state but also in my physical body manifesting as internal vibrating, tight painful muscles, irritable bowel, stomach issues, hot flashes, night sweats etc. This became so much worse when I entered menopause. God once told me that perfect love casts out fear and that there were blockages on my end that were blocking me from receiving His perfect love. In fact, He told me many years ago that when I trusted Him, I would receive my healing. This posed a huge problem for me – I found it incredibly hard to trust that God would not let me down. I had this fear that if I trusted Him and let go of my doubts and fears around this then something awful would happen and I would be so hurt that I would then reject God. I was so afraid of rejecting God through any hurt I suffered that it was easier to hang onto the mistrust.
Two days ago, I was with two ladies when I asked them if we could pray and see if there was any part of my soul that the enemy was holding captive. Straight away one of the ladies saw me as a young girl crying on my bed saying, “He left me, He left me”. Straight away I knew this was me as a child when my natural Father left the family unit because of my parents’ divorce. Although I still saw him most weekends, life for me was never the same. I was ten years old at that time and the security I had become accustomed to my entire life was shattered and gone. The Father is the head of the home and protects the wife and together they protect the children. The hurt, pain and abandonment I felt the day he left us had damaged my soul. I built walls of self-protection around myself and vowed to protect myself from hurt at all costs. My life become one of control – controlling my environment and things around me. I would imagine worst case scenario and go about fixing all I could to protect myself and my children from harm, danger, and pain. This was tiring and stressful. People would tell me to let it go and entrust myself and my family into God’s hands. I would pray and do this, then of course revert to believing I could do a better job and take back the control.
The other lady during the session saw a rapid river. I then heard the words ‘He leads me besides still waters’. The enemy had me trapped inside the rapid waters. A part of my soul that carried the memories of the day my Dad left was trapped in this place beside the rapid waters. No wonder I always felt like I was in danger and had no peace in my body. The Lord spoke and told me it was time to trust Him. I said that I could only trust Him if He could guarantee me 100% that nothing bad would happen to me and my family. He spoke in that moment and said He could not guarantee me that. The Bible says that suffering is part of the walk with Christ. The Spirit Himself bears witness with our spirit that we are children of God, and if children, then heirs—heirs of God and joint heirs with Christ, if indeed we suffer with Him, that we may also be glorified together (Romans 8:16-17, NKJV). He then told me that He could guarantee that He will never leave me and walk with me through the storms. This, however was not enough for me. I didn’t want any pain or hurt in my life and wanted Him to protect me from it all. In that moment the Holy Spirit then convicted my heart and showed me that I was not showing God unconditional love. One of the greatest commandments is to love the Lord Your God with all your heart, soul and mind. I was telling God that I could only trust Him if He could guarantee that nothing bad would happen to me or my family. God couldn’t give me what I wanted so I was basing how much of myself I could entrust to Him on that premise. I was putting false expectations on God. I then repented for putting conditions on my relationship with God and said how sorry I was that I was afraid that I might not follow Him if I believed He let me down. I told Him that I was supposed to love and trust Him in all circumstances and offer thanks to Him. I then told Him that I chose to trust Him and love Him and accepted His ways were above our ways. One of the ladies then saw me in the rapids in a canoe. The canoe represented God and His help in the rapids. The rapids represent the trials and tribulations we go through. The canoe enabled me to navigate the rapids easier and was much safer than being outside of it. The other lady then said ‘as I navigate through the rapids with God the calm waters which were on the other side of the rapids were getting closer’.
I went home and felt very happy about the revelation but the next day I became more afraid. He can never give me 100% certainty that I was protected or that bad things wouldn’t happen so how do I stop fearing these things? These things were consuming my life. I was basically afraid of everything. As I was pondering these things, I felt the Lord’s presence and this is what I heard Him speak to me ~ “If I protect you, you will follow Me. What if something goes wrong – will you stop following Me? Are you a Christian for what you can get or are you a Christian simply because you want to follow Christ because of what He did for you? He gave you eternal life, the inheritance is a bonus. Jesus died to give you the life God wants you to have. Parents want to bless their children simply because they love them. Do children love them because of what they give them, or do they love them because they were loved by them first? It is reciprocal. God loves us and wants us to love Him because He loves us. Through this love He wants to bless us so much and as heirs of God people talk about what they are entitled too. Instead of focusing on what you can get what about what we can give. We need to give our unconditional love to God the Father, Jesus and the Holy Spirit because of Who they are, rather than what they can do for us. He loves us simply because we are His kids. His love isn’t conditional on what we do and how good we are, He loves us anyway. He wants us to love Him the same in return. Human beings have an inbuilt selfishness and want Gods provision – they either base their love for Him on what He has done or what He can give. God wants us to love Him because He loves us. A reciprocal love. Really look at yourself. Imagine Job. Job had everything. God allowed the devil to take it all away. How would you feel about God if that happened in our lives? Would you still trust Him? Job did not curse God or walk away. Job respected and trusted God. He said, ‘thou He slay me yet I will trust in Him’. Because Job still loved God and trusted Him through these extreme circumstances God blessed him greater than before. Jesus asked Peter three times if he loved Him. This represents the testing of our hearts that we go through. God will test your love for Him. Do you love Him? Do you truly love Him or do you love what you can get from Him and what He can do for you?
If you have put conditions on God and your love is based on these conditions, then repentance is needed. God knows our heart and He knows our need for Him. We absolutely need what He can offer, but this does not mean we only love Him for what He can provide. If we are in a place where we are not receiving all He can provide we need to come to a place in those circumstances and say ‘God is God. He is my creator. He loves Me and is in this with me. He knows what is best for me and I trust that, and I trust Him’. The highest form of love for God is trust in Him in all circumstances. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you (1 Thessalonians 5:18, KJV).
Do you base your love for Me on conditions? Do you trust Me that I am God, that I have your back and I am in control of all things? What about when the enemy has right of power in your life (Ephesians 4:27) and he comes in to steal, kill and destroy? My children are perishing through lack of knowledge. This grieves me so. I want to teach My children how to thwart the enemy and take away his power that he has over you. I have good things for you. I do not want you to lack anything. My promises are for you simply because I want to bless you. When you put conditions on Me, this is lack of total trust for Me to supply your needs. You are essentially blocking what I already have for you. Repentance and confessing this as sin means the blockage is cleared. I exposed your heart and, in that moment, when you realised, I couldn’t give you the 100% guarantee that nothing bad would ever happen to you, you repented for your sin. This is good. You chose to love and trust Me regardless. Even though I can’t give that 100% guarantee to you I can 100% guarantee with all My heart that I have the best for you. That I am for you and not against you. That I love you and will always hold you up. That I care and adore you and will protect you. I will guard your heart and hold it in My hands for it is dear to me. I can’t give you what you want but you chose to love me anyway. That is true love – you now need to trust that I am with you in all things, and I will not let you down.”
(PRAYER) – “Father God in Jesus name I repent for not loving You unconditionally. I have based my love and trust in You on what You can do and what You can provide for me. This is putting conditions on God. You love me unconditionally and You want Me to love You unconditionally. I want for You to take away my pain and provide everything I need as this is part of my Kingdom Inheritance. Suffering with Christ is also part of my inheritance. Thank You that this suffering enables me to participate in Your glory and all for a good purpose. These things are all part of my inheritance. Your promise is to be with me in these trials and tribulations lifting me up. I trust that. Your word says to love You with all my heart, soul and mind. This means always, at all times. I am sorry for the times I blamed You, got angry with You, and even believed You let me down. I choose to trust, love and accept You. I believe that You are for me and not against me and are with me in all things. I ask that You would always show me when the enemy has been given power over me and my family so we can repent and turn from these things. The more power I can remove from the enemy the less power he has over me and my life. Thank You for Your Kingdom revelations that thwart the enemy. I trust You Father, Son and Holy Spirit. I love You, Amen.”
After I prayed this prayer I became enveloped in Gods presence and I heard Him speak over and over to me that He would never hurt me. I wept and wept as I understood this promise. God will never hurt me. God will never let me down. If circumstances look like He has, it is a lie. I looked up the word hurt in Strongs concordance and it is šeḇar and means break, fracture, breach, crush, crash, ruin, shattering and destroy. God promises to His children that He will never do any of those things to us. He is good and He loves us.
Let go and let God be in everything with you. No matter what the circumstances trust that He is with you and holding you up.
From Suffering to Glory
For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. For the earnest expectation of the creation eagerly waits for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of Him who subjected it in hope; because the creation itself also will be delivered from the bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation groans and labors with birth pangs together until now. Not only that, but we also who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, eagerly waiting for the adoption, the redemption of our body. For we were saved in this hope, but hope that is seen is not hope; for why does one still hope for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we eagerly wait for it with perseverance. (Romans 8:18-25, KJV).
By Tania Francis